You’re You For A Reason
Who doesn’t want to become someone else?
We look at other people’s lives and think “damn, it’d be nice to be them.” We see their clothes and compare them to ours. We see their achievements and compare them with our achievements (or lack thereof). We see their lives, full of glamor and splendor, and look back at our own boring and dreary ones.
It’s no wonder why many of us wish we could change.
I’ve experienced many short bursts of emotions where I see someone having a life that I want — it’s a mix of desire, shame, anger, and a whole smorgasbord of other feelings.
But I read a tweet last night that read:
“You’re you for a reason.”
And for some inexplicable reason, I think that’s true.
It’s a natural tendency to compare one’s lives with others. The grass is greener yada yada and what not. Of course, comparing has become exponentially easier thanks to social media and its advancements. It was bad enough when we only had feeds, but thanks to 24 hour stories, we now get to see what people are doing every single day of their lives.
And so, we see people raving at parties while we’re already in bed, and see people in Paris when we’ve never left our hometown. We believe that this life that people show on their social media is the right way to live, and whatever we’ve been doing all this time has been wrong.
But that simply isn’t true.
When we look at other’s lives and feel like our lives are inferior in one way or another, we forget one simple fact: other people are looking at our lives and thinking the same.
Everyone compares. Everyone has their flaws. What people show on social media isn’t real life, it’s a polished version of their lives. A lot of people say ‘why be sad on social media?’ and therefore, they upkeep this constantly happy persona on social media that isn’t genuine nor realistic.
No one is doing life right. No one has all the answers. No one is happy every single second of the day — no matter how much they make it look that way online.
So don’t compare yourself to others. That’s hard to do in practice, but it really starts with focusing on yourself and realizing that your existence is unique.
No one else can say they have been through the same experiences that you’ve been through, no one can say that they’ve had the same relationships that you’ve had, no one can say that they’ve had the same thoughts that you’ve had.
The experiences you’ve had, the people you’ve met, the thoughts you’ve thought, have all made you into a presence on this earth that cannot truly be replaced by anyone else.
You’re doing fine. You’re doing just as well as everybody else on this earth.
The fact that you still exist on this earth means that there are people that love you. There are places you’ve been and places you will go to. There are ideas and artworks that only you will make.
Society has told us time and time again that we, as individuals, are not enough. We’re not attractive enough, we haven’t traveled enough, we’re not interesting enough. Entire industries are built on this belief that you must become someone else before you can be enough.
But the reality is is that you are enough. You may not think it, but there are stories only you will every know, tales only you could ever tell, experiences that only you could ever recount. Your unique life experience is already interesting enough — and if the person you’re talking to isn’t interested, maybe you shouldn’t be talking to them in the first place.
Deciding to change yourself is not a bad thing. But don’t every change yourself to become someone you’re not, because you believe that the person you currently are is not enough.
You’re you for a reason. And you are enough.
